"I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear." -Nelson Mandela
"I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear." -Nelson Mandela
Every style of music deserves a chance right?
I give everything at least one listen before I say, “Oh no, that’s trash.”
But I mean, comparing todays artist to past artist isn’t even fair… They simply just can’t fuck with the old school vibes, on any level…
You have your few now who have some old school flavor, but it’s just not the same from when I was coming up.
We went from, “Hip hop Hooray! Hoooo! Heyyyy! Hoooo!” to “Soulja Boy Up In Dis Hoe, Watch Me Crank It, Watch Me Roll…”
What the fuck kinda of shift in music is that?
Comparing the two is like comparing Lebron to Kobe, you just shouldn’t do it…
This Is What Lupe Was Talkin About In His Song “Little Weapon”
“I Killed Another Man Today, Shot Him In His Back As He Ran Away, Then I Blew Up His Hut With A Hand Grenade, Cut His Wife Throat As She Put Her Hands To Pray. Just Five More Dogs Then We Can Get A Soccer Ball, That’s What My Commander Say (KONY). How Old? Well I’m Like 10-11, Been Fighting Since I Was Like 6 or 7.”
I Could Only Not Speak On It For So Long…
That’s Crazy… They Have NO CHILDHOOD…
“Cute, Smiling, Heartless, Violent, Childhood Destroyed, The Void Of All Childish, Ways, Can’t Write They Own Names, Or Read The Names That’re On Their Own Graves.”
They’re Growing Up In FEAR… That They Will Initially Become…
“Think You Gangsta? Popped A Few Rounds? These Kids Will Come Through And Murder Ya Whole Town, Then Sit Back, Smoke, And Watch It Burns Down, The Grave Gets Deeper The Further We Go Down.”
Initially I Didn’t Want To Speak On It, But When I Say It’s Everywhere On The Internet, I Literally Can’t Escape It, And Me Being A College Student It’ll Eventually Come Up In Discussion Anyways…
It Doesn’t Necessarily Affect Me As Far As My Daily Objectives… But Mentally I Wanted To Reject Anything Having To Do With It… The Harder I Fought Becoming Educated On The Matter, The More Influence It Gained…
“Why Are You Showing Concern Now?” or “I Thought You Didn’t Care?”
It’s Not That I Don’t Care, It’s Just Not Something That I Want In My Head… It’s Just Too Much… I Can’t Fathom What Is Going On Over There…
Better Late Than Never… Right?
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What do girls like in a guy? What do I have to do to get them to be attracted to me?
Aside from being more attractive, I hadn’t the slightest clue seeing that women are such complex creatures…
Now? I don’t really give a fuck at all… I’m becoming apathetic as the days stretch on, I’m lacking all the enthusiasm I used to have and have became a sarcastic douche bag…
I’m not disappointed about it because I feel this needs to happen.
On the bright side, I’ve met a young lady who see’s right through that and enjoy’s me for me, no bullshit, just on some chill shit, feel it?
But yeah, I give way too many fucks about too many things that I shouldn’t and lack the fucks necessary for things that I need, I’ve flipt the script…
Once you lose the fear of rejection, everything else becomes a cake walk because you break the wall that creates limits. I have no limits…
Now the slothful nature that has been deeply embedded in me is starting to exclude itself from my mindset, once that’s gone, it’s a wrap…
In saying all of this, I’ve covered about 2-3 different things… there’s more in the text than it presents…
That is all…
What do girls like in a guy? What do I have to do to get them to be attracted to me?
Aside from being more attractive, I hadn’t the slightest clue seeing that women are such complex creatures…
Now? I don’t really give a fuck at all… I’m becoming apathetic as the days stretch on, I’m lacking all the enthusiasm I used to have and have became a sarcastic douche bag…
I’m not disappointed about it because I feel this needs to happen.
On the bright side, I’ve met a young lady who see’s right through that and enjoy’s me for me, no bullshit, just on some chill shit, feel it?
But yeah, I give way too many fucks about too many things that I shouldn’t and lack the fucks necessary for things that I need, I’ve flipt the script…
Once you lose the fear of rejection, everything else becomes a cake walk because you break the wall that creates limits. I have no limits…
Now the slothful nature that has been deeply embedded in me is starting to exclude itself from my mindset, once that’s gone, it’s a wrap…
In saying all of this, I’ve covered about 2-3 different things… there’s more in the text than it presents…
That is all…
How you can kiss someone, swapping spit and shit & not get sick…
But you can step outside in the cold for 2 seconds and later that night have a sore throat…
I mean you can get sick from kissing someone as well if they lack personal hygiene, but Idk…
All that saliva being transfered… I know I’m not the only person who has thought of that…
2 Bitches have gotten me sick from kissing me and told me afterwards, “Oh yeah, we just kissed and I just got over a cold.”
Bitch say what?
Smh…
But anyway, with her I don’t have to worry about that lol ;P
I Had More On My Mind Then I Thought… I’m SOOOOOO Ready To Do Something About It…
All I Do Is Think About Possibilities Instead Of Acting On Them…
A lot Of Talk But I Can Only Do So Much Walking…
Too Much Fucking Opportunity To Be This Lazy…
Too Young To Be Depressed…
Too Talented To Not Convey It…
FUCK THAT, I’M OUT HERE!
That it’s crazy… All of the ways something can be interpreted… The tone of voice used when saying something…
My mom would ALWAYS tell me, “It’s not always what you say, it’s how you say it.“
Or she would say, “It’s your body language…”
You could mean something in the most sincere way possible, but if you have a grotesque look on your face when saying it, it can be interpreted the complete opposite of what you actually meant.
Myself for instance, I’m extremely sarcastic because I think 80% of what people say is just fucking dumb… So in return, I’ll reply in a nonchalant sarcastic manner. No I’m not stating that I’m just oh so intelligent and better than everybody, I think pretty much everything is stupid, but I digress…
For example, when reading what someone says, you can’t always feel the emotion that they put into that text just by reading it. If you’ve never heard their voice or know their dispositions, you really may have no clue as to what they actually mean. When you know someone, and perhaps possibly know a little bit about how they think, if you read their text you can almost hear them saying it in your head exactly how they are stating their case.
But I’m just having a moment, I think that’s crazy how many ways things can be interpreted…
Tell 100 people the same story, they all get a different message.
Half of me can relate to Danny & the other half can relate to Mike. Put the two together and you have one mixed up individual lol.
Danny’s perspective is more so where I’m at but I’m starting to merge with the dark side & go the same route as Mike xD
(Ya’ll know what I’m referring to).
Gentleman V.S. Pretentious Asshole..
Well, not so much pretentious, I’ve just reached that point where It’s like sometimes I care about peoples opinion on me, but after I realize how much I don’t really give a fuck, It’s like why did I care in the first place?
I’m “Supposed” to be, or “Expected” to be this all around nice, sensitive, caring guy, A.K.A. a “Simp”, but now I think I should only be that way towards those who matter, in my eyes anyway.
In the end, you will get judged anyway, so fuck it…
One slip, everyone turns their back, may as well let their expectations cease before they grow.
I don’t know if I’m stupid or what, like sometimes I honestly don’t know why I do half the shit I do… I reach out, I put myself out there, for what? Because I think something is still there? I think, “well maybe…” Nah nigga, fuck is you thinkin bruh?
I do that shit all the time even after telling myself not to do it… WHY THOUGH?
I don’t have an answer… It makes me upset with myself… I can be so blind sometimes…
Some of those times, I can’t see past my imagination and day dreams and get caught up in the what ifs rather than what actually is…
“Let it go Aaron…” is what I tell myself, but I’m so damn stubborn I never listen… Smh…
I want to talk to somebody but I don’t want to talk to anybody and I mean that in two different senses as of right now. Right now I’m bored out of my mind and I’d like to talk but nobody really has good conversation that is currently awake. But at the same time I don’t want to talk to anybody because I just don’t feel like creating complete thoughts and digging deep into conversation right now, I guess laying here in the dark by myself just kinda sucks sometimes and no I’m not ranting about how I’m alone, that I could give no fucks about, but let’s be real, it’d be nice to go to sleep with someone at night…
The second sense that I’m referring to is actually talking to someone working towards a “relationship.” Yeah, it’d be nice to have one of those too, but I don’t “need” it, just another “want.” While I want one I don’t need one, I’m probably not even mentally capable of taking on a relationship at this point in life, I’m too engrossed in other areas of my life trying to put the puzzle pieces of this masterpiece together. But…. Talking to someone every night, every morning, throughout the day, going out, having someone who you can confide in aside from friends and family is always something one fiends for…
Along with that comes bitter-sweet joy. It has it’s ups and downs just as the single life does, but me not being the outgoing player type, I guess that’s the only reason I prefer relationships, that’s my cup of tea as opposed to being single.
The constant let downs, past mishaps, broken bonds and friendships mean nothing to me, I can easily look past that, but I still have my doubts, who doesn’t? By the way, this John Coltrane I’m listening to while I write this is just everything in life right now… Any who, I know when the time comes everything will fall into place, that’s why I’m working on it right now. *Sighs* well, that’s all for now.
